Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Let Me Save You Two Hours

Wow, Godzilla was bad. And not "so bad it's good" either. It's "I want my 2 hours back. What am I doing with my life" bad. I'm going to save you 2 hours and just show you the Honest Trailer instead. It's far and away better than the movie itself.


Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Cheer Up, Buttercup: Goat Edition

This is a super short video that is sure to brighten your day. It always puts a smile on my face. And who can't spare eleven seconds to smile? Wow, that was so horribly cheesy, I feel I must apologize to myself and to the nation. Let's pretend I said something . . . better.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Adventures With Redbox

So the Monopoly game at McDonald's is back, and I won two free Redbox rentals. I decided to rent Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit. Don't judge me: I love spy thrillers and enjoyed Chris Pine in Star Trek.

First thing they don't tell you, is that if you reserve online, your rental starts that very second. I didn't realize that until I saw the email this morning, so by the time we got home from work, we had 4 hours to watch it.

We were about 20 minutes in when our Blu-Ray player gave up on life. It had been acting weird; we actually had to unplug it. I guess that's what you get when you buy something at Walmart for $80. We should have known better.

Anyway, what followed was a comedy of errors as we tried every single DVD player in the house. The one downstairs. The ten-year-old TiVo/DVD combo. Two computers. And a Wii. After our fifth machine, we finally realized that it wasn't working because only the player downstairs is compatible with Blu-Rays. 


So we just packed it up and took it back. What a waste. At least I didn't have to pay for it. This weekend we'll get a new machine from anywhere but Walmart and definitely not another LG.

Live and learn.

Monday, September 29, 2014

Adorable Dog Throws A Tantrum

I want this dog. It is the sweetest thing. He's having a great time swimming when mom comes along and tells him to get out of the water. At this point, he basically turns into a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. I've got to get Sammy a pool. I'd like to see what she'd do in water.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

My Favorite Show of All Time

I know some people may balk at the thought of Friends as the best show of all time. (I would've also accepted Arrested Development.) But what can I say? It makes me happy.

We are just five short days away from the 20th anniversary of the Friends premiere. I don't think I could find words to tell you how much I love this show. I have seen most episodes dozens of times (sadly not an exaggeration). I can recite entire episodes almost verbatim. I still watch a few episodes almost every single day in reruns.

So I was super excited when I saw they were doing a pop up art installation of Central Perk in Manhattan to celebrate the 20th anniversary. Below are some of my favorite photos of the event.

This is the exterior of the new Central Perk.

Pat the Dog was there. (Yes, that's his real name.)

Some props on display, including Emma's sonogram, Ross' comic book, and Phoebe's porno.

These are wedding props, including Monica and Chandler's vows and their wedding invitations. (You know, the ones Ross and Rachel had sex on.)

And of course, from one of my favorite episodes, Ross' leather pants. (Although I much preferred when he made a pair of paste pants in that poor girl's bathroom.)

Consider this my #tbt (Throwback Thursday) for the week.

Friday, September 5, 2014

Jury Duty In Small Town Texas

I hate jury duty. Always have. Back in California, I had it a handful of times and only had to physically go to the courthouse once or twice. All you did was sit in a waiting room for hours and hours, then they dismissed us because the case had settled. You never even saw a courtroom.

Well . . .

Small town Texas is different. First of all, there is no waiting room. You wait in the lobby then everyone piles into the courtroom. I'd say there were 150-200 people packed in like sardines into the most uncomfortably stiff wooden pews I've been in since my private elementary school chapel days. 

As for excuses and disqualifications, there were no receptionists that handled things like living in a different county. Nope. Everyone lined up in a single-file line and approached the bench one at a time. Already overwhelmed by my first time in an actual courtroom, I was sweating bullets as the bailiff motioned me forward. First of all, the judge sits so high up, you have to basically stand on your tiptoes to see over and speak with him. Secondly, there were five lawyers surrounding me plus a court reporter writing down every word that was said. This was exactly the audience I dreamed of when my anxiety disorder became part of The Public Record.

After stammering through my explanation for what seemed like an hour, he thanked me for my honesty and said he might dismiss me if they had enough people. So I sat there, nervously watching person after person get excused, thinking there is no way he's going to let me go. After about 15 people had hurriedly exited the courtroom, he called me back up and let me go.


The final difference between jury duty in California and small town Texas is that they paid me this time. I got six bucks for just showing up. I still prefer California's way of not having to show up at all, but it was a nice way to end the day. I'm secretly hoping they've entered some type of note in my potential juror file that says "CRAZY GIRL - DO NOT SUMMONS" but the logical part of me hopes they didn't. I really don't need that on the record.

All in all, an interesting experience . . . that I hope I don't have to do again for years to come.